This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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