I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize