I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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