i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
