"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
whose parrot is this?
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
