I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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