These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
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I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
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also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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