i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
