My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
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