Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
