AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
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