But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Girls should come with a carfax report
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
