But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
