I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
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Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
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Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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