i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
