Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
he was CRYING into my vagina
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Randomize
