i just wanna soil my oats bro
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
