theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
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