I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
