Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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