I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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