Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
