Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
