When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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