The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
