:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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