if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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