me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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