did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize