i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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