I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
