Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize