Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
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