We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
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