There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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