you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I just forgot I was standing up.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
