I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Randomize
