What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Randomize
