I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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