Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
