**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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