sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize