It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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