Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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