I heard we made out
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I think my nap took me to another dimension
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize