my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
