Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
