You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
It's no shave November. This is our time.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize
