So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that