with your own penis?
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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