god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
