Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
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