I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
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